Eyes on the Shepard

I have found myself changing.

And maybe not the good kind of change. I have had many people close to me tell me that I have been acting different.

Other than the fact that I have been in severe pain in my stomach... I guess I didn't know what it was.

But, the other day, I noticed what it was: my thoughts.

I seem to have forgotten my hope. So many things have changed in this year and I must have dropped it while I was trying to catch up. 

Life, this year, has felt like running on a treadmill that's going 6 mph. Maybe to some of you, that's a piece of cake. But a whole year of that will do something to you. At some point, my legs must have given out. 

You see, I've been carrying too much. I've been carrying too many people. It's worry. 

At church a couple months ago, during praise and worship, one of my home girls and youth leader came up behind me and spoke a few words to me that struck me to the core. She had no clue about what I was going through. She was just listening to God and speaking His words to me. She said something along the lines of, "Don't grow weary in doing good. You are carrying too many people. God knows your heart."

It's true. I had been doing exactly what she said not to. I had been growing weary in doing good. My eyes were on the sheep more than they were on the Shepard, and this caused me to try and do His job for Him. No one can handle the weight of the world, except Jesus, and I needed to get ahold of that. 

And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.

Galatians 6:9 NKJV

If you would like, read the following prayer out loud:

I am strong in You, Lord, but I have got to let go of this worry and doubt. Show me exactly who You are in all of the deepest ways. She me how to love without trying to take Your job. I cannot hold the weight of the world. Only You can do that. 

I plead the blood of Jesus over myself and everyone involved with me in Jesus name. I rebuke the devil away from us and the plans You have for us in Jesus name. Show us Your glory in the most beautiful ways. In Jesus name, amen.

What Consumes You

The young man said to Him, “All these things I have kept from my youth. What do I still lack?” Jesus said to him, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.” 

(Matthew 19:20, 21 NKJV)

The man in this story asked Jesus what he must do to be whole... To gain more. Jesus knew what was between Him and the man. For that man, it was money that held him back. And Jesus told him that. But the man walked away. He was not willing to let go of the one thing that consumed him.

For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height— to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen. 

(Ephesians 3:14-21 NKJV)

If we let go of that which is between us and Jesus.. He will give us everything we need. No need to worry. Jesus provides. Jehovah Jireh. 

Jesus, move us. Change us. I'm tired of holding on to the weights. Even if my flesh wants them... They pull me away from You. Lord, help us. Open our eyes. Give us the strength to do whatever it takes to follow after You. Even if that means leaving the thing we "love" most. Make us whole. Show us. Lord, You give us all good things. But when we let something take place of You... Things get dangerous for us. Idols lie and consume us. You fill and protect us. Jesus, You are truth. Fill us with truth. In Jesus name. I rebuke the devil over every reader in JESUS NAME. I rebuke guilt, shame, fear, lust, pride, demons, cloudy vision, gluttony, weapons formed against us, and anger and selfishness in JESUS NAME! EVERY DEMON MUST BOW DOWN TO THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST AND LET GO OF US IN JESUS NAME! I send angels to protect and minister to us all in Jesus name! I plead the blood of Jesus Christ over every reader in Jesus name. Fill us with JOY in Your presence. We Love You and we Praise You. We are ONE. In Jesus name. Amen.