Eyes on the Shepard

I have found myself changing.

And maybe not the good kind of change. I have had many people close to me tell me that I have been acting different.

Other than the fact that I have been in severe pain in my stomach... I guess I didn't know what it was.

But, the other day, I noticed what it was: my thoughts.

I seem to have forgotten my hope. So many things have changed in this year and I must have dropped it while I was trying to catch up. 

Life, this year, has felt like running on a treadmill that's going 6 mph. Maybe to some of you, that's a piece of cake. But a whole year of that will do something to you. At some point, my legs must have given out. 

You see, I've been carrying too much. I've been carrying too many people. It's worry. 

At church a couple months ago, during praise and worship, one of my home girls and youth leader came up behind me and spoke a few words to me that struck me to the core. She had no clue about what I was going through. She was just listening to God and speaking His words to me. She said something along the lines of, "Don't grow weary in doing good. You are carrying too many people. God knows your heart."

It's true. I had been doing exactly what she said not to. I had been growing weary in doing good. My eyes were on the sheep more than they were on the Shepard, and this caused me to try and do His job for Him. No one can handle the weight of the world, except Jesus, and I needed to get ahold of that. 

And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.

Galatians 6:9 NKJV

If you would like, read the following prayer out loud:

I am strong in You, Lord, but I have got to let go of this worry and doubt. Show me exactly who You are in all of the deepest ways. She me how to love without trying to take Your job. I cannot hold the weight of the world. Only You can do that. 

I plead the blood of Jesus over myself and everyone involved with me in Jesus name. I rebuke the devil away from us and the plans You have for us in Jesus name. Show us Your glory in the most beautiful ways. In Jesus name, amen.

"I Don't Care"

This whole year my life has completely changed. From having my grandma pass away to leaving the school and town I was raise up in. Honestly, I have kept a good attitude about it.. For the most part. But in the past few months I have not been. 

Honestly, I think the pain became more real and.. I started to push out the pain as best as I could. Ignore it. Unfortunately, this didn't have the effect that I thought it would. I've grown a little cold. I have caught myself becoming careless about what I'm thinking. Over and over I have been telling myself, "I don't care." 

After "not caring" I guess you could say I started to believe that I didn't care. After this.. I started to become more numb than ever. 

Now, I believe that everyone has a moment like this or two.. Where they feel like a robot or that they are in a dream. I have had this happen to me. But this... This is something completely different. 

Have you ever went in an out? You felt as if you were floating and the world was not there? Blank mind.. No feelings. Nothing. 

Yep.. That's what I'm talking about. That has been me the past month or so. It just kept getting worse and worse. 

Honestly, I don't know if anyone will even read this... Considering I haven't posted very many frequent posts on this blog. But if you are reading, keep listening. What I am about to say may do something in you.

Sometimes I would feel everything.. And it would hurt. It's like a simple emotion could wreck me. Other times I felt nothing at all. My mind would go blank, and then I snap out of it. Yes, I am okay. I guess it just took me realizing something for me to see what was happening to me.

After opening up to a really good friend about what I was feeling, I realized that wha was happening to me was not all in my head. Honestly, I thought I was crazy. But, it turns out that he understood. He went through it, too. This completely changed my perspective. 

Days after this, I opened up to three other people that I trusted about what had been happening. All three of them had been through the same thing and understood me word for word. I think this is what woke me up. I am not crazy. I am not alone.

The devil does that a lot. It's one of his things.. To make us feel alone. Even if we aren't sitting there thinking, "Gee, I'm alone," we could still be believing the lie that we are. When we think we are alone, we shut people and anything out. 

I don't even know if I am read to post this yet, considering I am still figuring this out. But, I'm going to do it anyways.. Just in case someone is going through the same thing that I have been. If you feel numb.. You can still feel. If you can still feel... You're still here. If you're still here... You're here for a reason. Do NOT give up. 

If you are reading this and you felt God move in you and around you, or you have been dealing with this too... Feel free to share or message me in the comments below. Jesus is not a lie. He is real and by this you know that is true. 

My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. 

(James 1:2-3 NKJV)

Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much. (James 5:16 NKJV)

Blessings, 

Kristin :*

Perfect

It's been awhile since I have posted... But that is seriously going to change. I think I am just going to be more real on here. Don't get me wrong.. This blog is to encourage you all.. But maybe it's time I become a little more transparent in my posts. After all.. We all want real.. Don't we? I know I do. 

This year has been a year of exposure, for me. 

I realized a lot of my weaknesses and I have finally accepted that I cannot be perfect.. Not do I want to be. I'm such a messy person.

As Christians.. I think it's important that we don't hide that. We cannot be perfect. I remember reading in Psalms that God remembers that we are made of dust. He knows we are gonna mess up. He doesn't expect us not to. He just wants to keep us from pain.. Which sin causes. 

This year I have experienced a lot of change which pulled me straight out of my comfort zone. I was exposed to myself and I have realized that I need to stop lying to myself. I cannot make up for what I didn't do right. God perfects me. I cannot perfect myself. 

Perfect, when it comes to us, shouldnt mean everything about us is without spot. It should mean that we realize our weaknesses, we don't try to hide them, and we realize who IS perfect. Perfection is not found in what we do.. But what HE did. 

Blessings, 

Kristin :*

Do It Yourself: Tie Dye Shoes

       These shoes were so fun and easy to make! It cost about $10 to create them. If you make some, share a picture in the comments below!

Blessings,
Kristin

The Battle to Be Pretty

I am beautiful.

Ouch. We want to believe that, right? That we are beautiful, gorgeous, attractive, pretty, smart, down to earth... Right? We want it so bad.

I know that I'm not the only one who's ever thought I was not beautiful or worth it or couldn't  do anything worth living for.
Look, I just gotta let you know... You are Beautiful. Yes, you.

Satan wants to destroy us. And a big way to do that is to get us to hate ourselves. The world does not want us to love ourselves.

Do yourself a favor and go look yourself in the eyes in the mirror and tell yourself what the devil doesn't want you to believe: "I am Beautiful. I am Kind. I am WORTH IT. I am Strong. I am a Woman/Man of God. I am trustworthy. I am delivered. I am anointed. I am a vessel to change the world.

The devil will use these insecurities that we have to hinder us from doing our God-given calling. Insecurities are rooted by fear... And fear pulls us away from God.

In the gospels, Peter was walking on water and then became afraid of the storm and the waves all around him. That's when he started to sink.... when he took his eyes of Jesus and became afraid. Faith heals. Fear does quite the opposite. . . . if we let it.

Just know this, you are an amazing human being that is here for a purpose. Stay. Because you have made it this far. Keep going and run in faith that you are beautiful and Jesus has forgiven you. Watch and see dreams come true. Believe. Everything will be more than okay. You are precious.

Take heart in the fact that you are so beautiful, heart and soul. Body and spirit. You have been bought with such a high price. See that you are worth more than all the riches in the world.

Then Jesus said to them again, “Most assuredly, I say to you, I am the door of the sheep. All who ever came before Me are thieves and robbers, but the sheep did not hear them. I am the door. If anyone enters by Me, he will be saved, and will go in and out and find pasture. The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd gives His life for the sheep. But a hireling, he who is not the shepherd, one who does not own the sheep, sees the wolf coming and leaves the sheep and flees; and the wolf catches the sheep and scatters them. The hireling flees because he is a hireling and does not care about the sheep. I am the good shepherd; and I know My sheep, and am known by My own. As the Father knows Me, even so I know the Father; and I lay down My life for the sheep. And other sheep I have which are not of this fold; them also I must bring, and they will hear My voice; and there will be one flock and one shepherd. “Therefore My Father loves Me, because I lay down My life that I may take it again. No one takes it from Me, but I lay it down of Myself. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again. This command I have received from My Father.” (John 10:7-18 NKJV)


-Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

My Experience At Youth America - UNDEFEATED -

       On July 14-18 I was at Youth America in Oklahoma City, OK. It was so amazing. I had been dealing with a lot on the inside before I went. And God healed me. The worship there is great.. so extremely powerful. And that is one of the biggest things that touched me. I would be thinking about something that hurt me very bad during worship, and right at that moment someone would turn around and pray for me! RANDOMLY! But it wasn't random to Jesus. He knew what I needed... right when I needed it.
       I wasn't the only one who got healed from things at this camp. My friend Alex Carter said, "I expected the unexpected."       Lorrin Travis said, "It was really moving. God's love was shown. There are no words for how great His love is."       Shelly Moore said, "Youth America opened my eyes to so many things. It showed me that I am not perfect, I don't need to be perfect, I am strong in Christ, I don't need other people to tell me I am special or amazing in order for it to be true, and that I need to do more for God and His kingdom. Not only for His kingdom, not only for His glory, but for the benefit of every sinner (which I am as well). I also was taught how to love everyone for who they are and not what they have done or had done to me. I became set free through these lessons and now, I'm undefeated!"
        This really did change many lives... now we are off to change the world.

Promised

For our God is a consuming fire.

Hebrews 12:29

Sometimes, it's so hard not to be troubled by everyday life challenges. We are constantly bombarded with things that are used to try and get us to look down. Then when we get distracted, we get scared... And fall. 

No matter where you've gone, what you've done the calling and plan by God on your life has not been turned over. If you're still here, you can still get there. There is no such thing as a lost cause.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

 1 John 1:9 

For the gifts and calling of God are never withdrawn.

Hebrews 11:29

If you've ever read about King David, Apostle Paul, and Apostle Peter you know that Jesus turns messes into messages. These men fell over and over into the same sins and self doubts... But Jesus showed them that through Him try can do anything. The Lord is no respecter of persons.. Meaning He doesn't love one more than the other. Amazing! 

All things work together for the good to them that love God and are called according to His purpose.

Romans 8:28

Jesus, seriously, thank you. Everything will be okay. It has been promised by you that everything will work together for good. We love You and we're called according to Your purpose. Hallelujah! I plead the blood of Jesus Christ over every reader and their lives and family in Jesus name. I send angels to protect and minister to them all in Jesus name. Lord, show us what You see in us. In Jesus name. Amen.